Lose balance for love

When they met, both were studying Civil Engineering in Carabobo state. She was from Maracay and José had an apartment in Valencia.

Shortly after they started dating, he raised the possibility of living together so that she wouldn't have to travel from one city to another every day.

They were a couple in tune, they traveled the same road at a similar pace. But one day José's life got complicated. He had to drop out of school and go to work. He was falling behind in his career and his free time was less and less.

Despite that, he was comfortable with their relationship, they had been together for almost eight years, and although they never married, he felt her his rightful wife. He wanted more, he always wanted more.

Therefore, he saw what he wanted to see and acted as a fool at any sign that could inflict pain on him. Your partner graduated and left. José lost his job, did not finish his degree, and was stuck with the same thought: “she took advantage of me”.

After the breakup, it was all panic attacks, obesity, tension problems, arrhythmias and depression. When he thought he was hitting bottom, he found he could dig even deeper.

So, he sought professional help but the psychologists only spoke to him about "behavior patterns" and, in his opinion, they classified him as "one more of the bunch".

In the midst of his despair, one ordinary afternoon, he began to write down all the mantras he had and to have, the phrases of books that seemed written for him on small pieces of paper.

He fought with all his might to give up the "compulsive use" of pornography. Porn - he confesses - generated a lot of dependency on him. Similarly, he stopped visiting brothels and avoided alcohol. He started exercising and went back to college. 

He did the math and realized that he had everything to be happy, he just needed to understand why he wanted to remain depressed? What was stopping him from celebrating his little victories? He still hadn't figured it out, but he chose to be kinder to himself and to his surroundings.

Between advances and setbacks, she realized that the pain was gone and -as often happens- her ex sniffed that she was being overcome and decided to return. She screamed her repentance from the rooftops, but he no longer wanted his past to become present.

"We were happy at some point and I just wanted to keep that moment for the rest of my life, but it couldn't and today we are just two strangers who once lived together."

But despite the lessons learned and some mutual attractions, José remains alone. Believe it is the best way to stay out of trouble. Her excuses remind me of one of my favorite scenes of eating, praying, and loving, when Ketut Liyer tells Liz that "sometimes losing your balance for love is part of living a balanced life."

Tell me your story, write it as it may, together we shape and share it. Spread the different forms of love, it is always necessary: [email protected]

 

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